WOW

I just finished watching the movie Australia and it is amazing. I don't think I've cried that much at a movie in a long time. That's partly because I don't let other people see me cry. Not even my family. So when watching Milk in a crowded burrow of course I held back the tears. Even watching The Secret Life of Bees with just my family I wouldn't let myself cry. Its not like I am ashamed of feeling and crying, it is one part of myself that I love I still cry at Rent even though I've seen the movie like 60000000000000 times. I don't know why I don't like people to see me cry. Sometimes I say its because I don't want anyone asking why. That is so annoying you know sometimes you just want to cry. Sometimes you just need to cry. Does it really matter why? If I was so upset I needed to tell you I would believe me. Of course it could be something else in me not letting me cry. At least I can and I am not like Cameron Diaz's character in the Holiday. Anywho the point to this is basically even though the past few days have been really good days, it still felt really good to have a crying purge. I feel very refreshed. I feel hopeful and ready to go on my walk around so I can get to my happy ending. I guess I am on my walk around now. Learning, a rite of passage, sort of.
the kinda sad thing is... my list of movies i want just went up 2 and the ones i want to buy next month went from 3 to 4. I'm glad i didn't go to target then, cuz i bet i would have bought one there and i really don't have the money for it.

Peace, Love, Harmony